Hot takes on Monday Morning Quarterback
Football columnist and shill for the NFL advocating a war against Russia? Peter King, stick to sucking up to Roger Goodell.
I left my phone at the bar I went to last night. I had nightmares that I’d come back, and everybody was reading my texts messages out loud and laughing to each other. In one dream they were like calling people and asking them if their refrigerator was running.
It’s like my friend Josh says, “You’ve got great anxiety dreams.”
Fortunately, nobody steals a fucking blackberry in 2014.
Marge, I’m goin’ to Moe’s. Send the kids to the neighbors, I’m comin’ back loaded!
blaaargh said: You should be taking as many pictures of the cats as possible.
If the cats don’t run away in abject fear when they hear me approach, then yes, i’ll take a picture.
So, on Saturday, I come down to see one of the cabinet doors open. Being too hungover to make decent decisions, I decided to look in without thinking “The cat is probably in there. I stuck my head in liek a lion tamer, and see a flash of fur bolt towards me. I fall back, and the cat is running towards the back door, realizing that there’s no more space, then turning around and running towards the basement. It was the closest I’ll ever get to the facehugger scenes from the alien movies.