February 2012
218 posts
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Can we have one important game where the USMNT...
Do some P90X motherfuckers.
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BREAKING: Rick Santorum bows out of Republican... →
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It sucks that we won’t be able to memorialize Davy Jones passing until 2016.
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If knowing your history prevents you from being doomed to repeat it, then my Dad is certainly safe from capitulating to the Germans.
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Who’s Kiss endorsing?
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Jose Canseco: Today In Jose Canseco Tweets As... →
This is a new feature where we celebrate Jose Canseco by creating motivational posters out of his actual tweets. We believe it is in this context that the world can best appreciate our favorite Bash Brother. Today’s example is from February 23, 2012.
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New Mottos for America.
”Police say alcohol may have played a factor.”
“I bought a new lock for my bike.”
“That’s Reverse Racism!”
“I don’t like their crepe selection.”
“Next, on Mickey Spillane’s, ‘Mike Hammer.”
“You got the right one baby, uh huh.”
“No dude, she gets completely naked.”
“I...
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Has Andre Villas-Boas Been Sacked Yet? →
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Jose Canseco Does A Mean Tracy Morgan Impression
oldtimefamilybaseball:
If you add “Liz Lemon” to the end of Jose Canseco’s tweets, he sounds exactly like Tracy Morgan on 30 Rock. Don’t believe me? Try it below:
As always, if you want to read more of Canseco’s stunning comedy routines, follow him on Twitter. Inspiration for the post courtesy of Funny or Die.
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Thus far, been a bad year for Douglas/invertebrate relations.
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Doug's Mom, Action Taxes 4
Mom: H&R block has no idea how many customers I refer to them.
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Doug's Mom, Action Taxes 3
Mom: Let me tell you about _____________. She had me on the phone for an hour trying to see if I could deduct diapers. DIAPERS.
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The Benefits of a Classical Education
My cousin is asking me to write a three minute speech for her class.
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New York Magazine's List of Other "Seinfeld"... →
inothernews:
George Costanza: “I lie every second of the day. My whole life is a sham!”
Jerry Seinfeld: “You’re going to really see me being a phony, now. I hope you can take this. Maybe you should go in the other room.”
George Costanza: “Just remember. It’s not a lie … if you believe it.”
Jerry Seinfeld: “If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right.”
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Out of all the songs that could possibly be used for a commercial, “Ridin” by chamillionaire is in the bottom ten.
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This Week on Hoarders
Zasio: Well what about this one?
Doug: Justice League Europe, issue 19 from October 1990? You gotta be kidding me, that’s a fucking collector’s item.
Zasio: (furrows brow).
Doug: It’s the conclusion to the extremists arc!
Zasio: There’s a coffee ring over Captain Atom’s face.
Doug: It’s still good.
Zasio: (Furrows Brow)
Doug: What. It’s still...
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Ta Da!
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Not sure what’s up with the color scheme, but I do like me some old man Grainger rage.
i was going to respond to somebody’s post with an Are You Being Served gif, but found a shocking lack of them. There’s just thirty of the same Mr. Humphries reactions.
Well… I’m going to change that.
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Really though
You can say that about every Republican candidate ever ever ever.