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the best part about taking a boat to pier six for a concert is all the jealous mothefuckers looking at your opulence and despairing. Jokes on you motherfuckers, I manage a bar. 

Started at the bottom now i’m here

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Amazing time, and yes, I’m going on that motherfucker’s boat more often. I paid 20 bucks, and I gave him twenty more and said, “I’ll see you soon.” 

Amazing time, and yes, I’m going on that motherfucker’s boat more often. I paid 20 bucks, and I gave him twenty more and said, “I’ll see you soon.” 

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Your kiss is on my list

Your kiss is on my list

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I’m fucking wasted

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Want to show you a clip from my new psychedelic children’s show, “Captain Doug’s Fun Time Psilosybin adventure hour.”

Want to show you a clip from my new psychedelic children’s show, “Captain Doug’s Fun Time Psilosybin adventure hour.”

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Alright, fine you fucks, i’ll go. Time to find my yuppie disguise. Bring forth the polo shirt and khakis.

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Security! 
*Points at your blog

Security! 

*Points at your blog